I usually think of myself as a fairly level-headed person. I weigh evidence, I try to evaluate all sides of an argument, I gather data. I will admit to having a superstitious side--there was a gate where I went to undergrad that, legend had it, you couldn’t walk out of (walking in was a topic of popular debate) before your graduation or you’d fail out of school; I was one of several people who didn’t really believe that...but always took the side exit anyway, since it was just as easy. However, superstitions aside, I’m not usually the type to get bent out of shape over something without some reasonable demonstration that it’s actually a big deal. You can imagine my surprise then, to discover that I’ve become at least a little afflicted by the famed hypochondriasis that afflicts medial students when taking pathology.
Now I have another confession to make: I’m the child of two physicians. For those of you who’ve not had the pleasure, let me recount for you what it’s like to be sick or injured in a house like that:
CC: “Mom, I think I’m sick.”
Mom: “Did you take Advil? No? Take 2, then talk to me in a few hours.”
...a few hours later...
CC: “Mom...still sick.”
Mom: “Ok, take 4 Advil, and we’ll see how it’s going before bed.”
...before bed...
CC: “I still don’t feel well.”
Mom: “Ok, time for the big guns: take 4 Advil and 2 Tylenol, and we’ll see if you feel better in the morning.”
In the grand scheme of things, it’s a very sensible approach: most nondescript illnesses in kids are self-limiting, and symptoms are improved by anti-inflammatory and anti-pyretic drugs. To be fair, I never had anything with Strep-like symptoms that wasn’t properly evaluated, and any orthopedic trauma was also taken reasonably seriously. However, I was incorrectly treated for asthma for years before ever getting a proper workup (since the meds never really seemed to help...what a shock). In any case, the point is that, by and large, most illness in otherwise healthy people is pretty mild. So when I got my fourth upper respiratory infection (URI) this academic year, you’d think I’d chalk it up to working in a pediatrician’s office a couple of times a month, and leave it at that. Oh no, not CC. CC trotted down to Student Health for labs, and then spent the week conjuring up scenarios by which one might have acquired some immune deficiency or had an otherwise unremarkable exposure to blood-borne pathogens: I told my dad about my recurring illnesses, and he made a joke about checking an HIV titer....despite ZERO exposure/reason to believe I’d be HIV+, this comment freaked me out enough to get that done with the rest of my lab panel. I mean, there was a guy in another class who got leukemia after his first year--maybe I had that?! This was of course when I wasn’t sitting in Path lecture wondering how I’d ever know if I was getting acromegalic, since I don’t wear hats enough to notice an increase in hat size...
I’m really floored that I’ve completely been overtaken by this now-cliched phenomenon: I know better. I know better! Yet that little kernel of anxiety that I’ve learned to suppress with logic suddenly sprang to life, and I’ve been having a hell of a time putting it back in its little box that is supposed to sit in the proverbial basement of my psyche. Believe me, taking psychopathology concurrently hasn’t helped. The good news is that there’s a happy ending: all my labs were “within normal limits” (save an increased eosinophil count befitting someone as allergic as I am), so maybe now I can go back to studying for my micro exam without wondering if my last respiratory illness was Histoplasmosis...
Great post! I am also a medical student... in my third year... and I can say that kind of thing only gets worse! =)
Once second year is over... you're onto the wards.. and you get exposed to everything... I can't tell you how paranoid I was at the front end... but it gets easier... every day! Enjoy second year, though... even the studying... it's a time when you are free to study all the time... I know that sounds weird... but there have been times during the third year that I REALLY wanted time to actually study and learn... you have so much clinical stuff to do... at least at my university... anywhoo... looking forward to following you! I'm going to add you to my blogroll!!
Posted by: Veggielady4life | March 17, 2010 at 12:07 PM